Never teh Bride's Dream Wedding

Perusing the online offerings of the Boston Globe this morning, I noticed that they were featuring photos of readers' weddings. Two out of the three weddings were simple ceremonies held on the beach while the other was an extravaganza that involved an asymetrical dress that looked more flamenco than bridal.

Now, like any dreamy-eyed girl, I like to think about the details of my own perfect wedding. Not that I hold any illusions of perfection in the reality of it. Seldom do weddings turn out just so, and teary, disheveled brides are the result.

Poor things. I think there might be less stress on future brides if the future husbands were to offer just a teensy bit of help. I know that The Finger Ribboner is handling all the details of her wedding to MDJ. But who knows...he may just be stepping back from the whole thing because he'd rather not interfere with her dream wedding. Or maybe he's a lazy git. Or maybe she's taken the reins and isn't willing to share responsibility. Really, I have no idea and it's none of my beeswax.

Anyhow, while looking at the photos of other people's weddings, I was struck by this idea shown in the photo above. Each folding white chair (which are a fixture in my dream wedding) has been decorated with a pretty gift bag (presumably in the wedding party's colors) filled with fun stuff that's also useful. That's right...none of these awful ceramic centerpieces. I once attended a bridal dinner wherein at each place setting sat a ceramic bag. Yes, a faux bag crafted out of off white ceramic festooned with fake-looking pink flowers that resembled piped icing. I thought to myself, when bringing the damn thing home for my ex roommate who loved to break pottery, who would spend valuable wedding money on such crap?

Useful doesn't mean jordan almonds or a commemorative matchbook. I want to married on the shores of the Banana River, out of doors, with plenty of white folding chairs and tulle ribbons and baby's breath (since it will hold up in the heat) and a portable dance floor and a cake that's homemade so it actually tastes good and not like the cruddy dry cakes I've been subjected to at other people's weddings. Do you hear that people? Whipped buttercream frosting is disgusting when it's topping a mass-produced sponge cake!


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At 12:06 PM, Blogger Never teh bride said...

You're welcome!

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